Wednesday, July 05, 2006

this is my reason...

let me educate u on my experience with religion.

ok i'm just bored so i will just educate myself. u dun haf to read it. hurhur

my 1st contact with "real" religion was in my pri sch. i rmbered clearly tt my best friend forgot to get her parents to sign her spelling bk so she started to panic & asked us : "how?"
we comforted her, saying let's hope tt e teacher doesn't check e spelling bk today. then she started praying very hard to her god tt e teacher will forget. when e teacher came in, we had to stand up to greet e teacher. she was like :" harr, but my prayers won't work if i stand up to pray." i rmb saying smthing stupid like u just continue praying while we try to cover u up. (rmb we were still young @_@) tt was my first encounter with ppl prayin to their god (which is different frm my usual idea of getting incense to pray to ur ancestors.)

e 2nd encounter wasn't what u would call a pleasant one.
my p5/6 form teacher is a christian & he wld always subtly hint to us tt he had put a few bks in our class library abt christ & stuff & wld encourage us to read it. he wld also let us watch movies abt jesus christ & stuff but we weren't very put off cus no body bothered to read e bks he left in e library & we wld rather watch movies then study so it was kinda ok. however, we began to see notices being put up once a fortnight on our form teacher's metal cupboard to congratulate a fellow classmate for accepting christ. apparently, my form teacher & one of my classmate who is a pious christian started sharin their god & getting ppl to go to church & converting ppl. me & my frens weren't very pleased, with e irritating presence of e notices, e wording of e notices & e fact tt u haf classmates ard u trying to convert ppl pissed us of tremendously. my fren attacked tt classmate saying smthing like :" why? u all don't have enough christians arh? "

so yar, my first contact with christianity wasn't a very gd one & since then i became a anti-christian. however, some part of me still felt tt there was a higher being up there. when i was sec sch, i got a new prespective of religion when a actor in a show said smthing like, the reason y we pray is nt to e higher being up there but because there's a god in every one of us. our desires, our hopes & everything else lies within us & these r the things tt we pray for.

somehow tt sentence has affected the way i look @ religion, even till today. athetism to most ppl may seem like a very extreme view since it condemns all religion & even denies the existence of miracles, a higher being & all e unexplained happenings tt can only be justified as e presence of a higher being. most ppl who've learnt of my beliefs have asked me to tone down my views & be receptive to things tt cannot be explained by science alone. my sis got e same reaction frm her friends, & even though she's nt as extreme as me, she still gets bks & notes frm her friends saying they'll pray for her, hoping someday she'll come to accept god's love.

i don't think by being an atheist, i'm losing out in anyway, nor am i afraid of god's warth or going to hell because these things are just simply nt within our control. i believe in e present & e things we can achieve in e present. i believe in working hard & getting what we want by our own efforts.

i don't think being an atheist justifies me the right to condemn religion because to condemn religion wld be to disrespect e beliefs of others. being an atheist doesn't mean i'm allergic to e bible or e quran. i will still read it & learn their values at my own pace & i do nt deny tt i've learnt much frm e beliefs of various religions. being an atheist doesn't mean i will nt discuss religion with anyone but rather i cannot understand ppl who cannot accept me as much as i try to accept their religion & them as they are. as much as they wish to ask me y i don't believe in any god, i too have this urge to ask them why can't they accept the fact tt there is no god.

let me define my view on atheism.
atheism to me is not a religion, it is a set of unrestricted beliefs which i am free to expand on & to make my own rules & regulations. atheism is a belief which is a result of my observations of life, an accumulation of my experiences dealing with different things & the lessons i've learnt. it is nt smthing tt i believe in w/o any rhyme or reason, nt smthing tt i follow in without any justifications. atheism is constantly reasoning & questioning & justifying it with science, reason & experience.

i believe tt miracles r possible nt because of a higher being but e simple belief in onself & his potential to achieve what others deem as impossible. it is sheer will, resilience & strong belief in what u can achieve in tt pushes u to do things which ppl wld call miracles. i see it as the mind, and i believe in the infinte possibilities of the mind & it's capabilities. i do nt believe in heaven & hell, sin or guilt, e ideas in which others propagate to be right or wrong because it cannot convince me & thus i see no reason to believe in it or follow it. i do pray but nt to e higher being but to reaffirm my goals & aims in life, to remind myself of what i really want & get myself to achieve it. i do nt believe tt god answers our prayers. i only believe tt we can answer these prayers ourself.

so if there is a god, it is a form taken after our desires, hopes & dreams. this is my god. can u accept it?

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