Tuesday, July 29, 2008


a gift from my student who once wrote, 'shut up u stupid idiot' on his maths workbk just for me & traumatised me like hell after tt. i nvr got over that until i saw this card. but the skeleton hand is nt really helping with a apology XD HOHO

i'm addicted to cabal, of all times to be addicted to something when u're just abt to start sch. & it's been a yr & a half since i've sat down with books & notes to study hur hur except for my BTT & i flunk it yoh. sthuuupid

and i've also amassed buckloads of coloured pens and refills for red pens and 2 full pencil cases of stationery. lol. nxt time i start working i shld kope more stationery items from student. MUAHAHA. see my enthusiasm abt studying? SEE SEE SEE!!!! XD WOOT.


to actually start school & be a student again wld mean a whole lot more to me this year then it did last yr.
i was a working adult last year, receiving a self sustainable but meagre salary enough only for myself but not enough for a family. i listened with envy & sometimes irritation at how ppl talked abt sch in funny terms like modules AUs credits hall wad block wad. it all didn't make sense & it just made me feel more left out den i already was.

now tt u're a student, treasure it, my senior said. i guess it really makes alot more sense now tt i have a vague idea of how working e world is like, it's temptations & vices, with everything being tied to financial & hierachial status. all these doesn't matter now tt i'm in sch. for now.... i hope.

continue to inspire and be inspired. rock on.

Monday, July 14, 2008

e greatest insult u can give to a teacher is to be asked to be transferred out of that class.

& my ex-students just did tt.... e nerve.

so now i few guilty for smirking at her.... zzzzzzzzzz

i think my life has become pretty much stagnant after a year of ups and downs after e As.
it's pretty ironic since i've always wanted stability & the waiting for the unknown nearly drove me crazy, now that i know what course i'm going to, i feel... bored? LOL. yesh slap me.

and all my good good pals are enjoying life in the USA. can u believe it?! 3 idiots. LOL. so now i always see them online & wish them goodnight at the weirdest hours of the day. & i miss them like shit.

Sunday, July 13, 2008

my evil twin

how do u look up to someone when she turns out to be completely different from what u've thought she used to be.

is either she gave me the wrong impression, or i had judged her too quickly or that she has just changed.

i'm serious because e more i know her e more i'm turned off.

here she is stressing on the point she's been through so much in life, that she's so much older than the rest of the new teachers that she's so damn experienced that i shld just worship the ground that she walks on and call myself useless. in fact, being with her has made me feel very worthless because the spotlight's always on how she deals with things correctly and how wrong i've done or screwed up. & i was so stupid to be led around by the nose.

"do you think i'm pretty or beautiful?"
"i was like that last time, i've been through this before"
& she shld be honoured that i'm dedicating a blogpost to her.

and it's kinda of sad, because i was just about to prove to myself that colleagues can be ur friends too.

pray for me, she said. pray that i'll stay sane. inside me i just smirked.


would doing something wrong be justifiable by the simple reason of, i love u i care for u, so i betrayed u for u.