Dear XXX,
I guess there's a lot I want to say...
But most importantly, I wanna know who I am...
But the problem is now I can't ask people as to who I am, for they will not tell the whole truth or that they do not have the answers to which I seek.
I will need to observe what the others feel about me...
But from what I feel I think they're just okay with my presence...
Yet observations may be wrong too, for I may be too sensitive or that I may be too anxious & see only what I want to see...
For u see herein lies the problem, for I cannot trust myself to be rational, I cannot trust my own judgement...
Does that lie with me feeling inferior? Or with me lacking self confidence?
These are the things I wish to get answers
These are the things I wish to get guidance...
For I want to improve myself...
There is this feeling telling me that I've stopped improving a while ago, that is pushing me to move forward...
Have I become complacent?
I just feel that I've been asking the same questions & looking in the same places for answers for too long... that this search has become meaningless to me...
I wish to know where I have gone wrong...
frustration...

I need guidance...

Yours sincerely,
estelwen