Friday, March 18, 2005

38.4 degress & going up

mood: feverish
msn nick: 因为没有永恒,所以珍惜

so i was chased home by my mother today.. well not exactly chased home but then she had to call through the hp & starts whining that i've been slacking & stuff, says i'm wasting my time & all the other rubbish.. the initial frustration was that i wanted to juz squeeze my hand over & fight with her or something.. therefore, my mood for the rest of the day was quite spoilt. (disadvantages of modern technology...) surprisingly, after a while, i was quite pleased with myself that i wasn't as angry as i should have been or would have been in the past... oh wells
meanwhile, my brain is being cooked, steamed, deep fried by the fever. i wonder what human brians taste like, isit similar to that of a pig brain since we're not much different from them in terms of stupidity.
haven been thinking much for a while, dun really wanna care what happens around me.. personally, SOS is a stupid place because they state the obvious, because what i need is not a listening ear, but a sense of direction, of where i'm going in life, what i wanna be in life. but i guess for others, especially girls according the teacher, just want a listening ear.. i guess that's fine with me (although this has led me to doubt my sexuality... wadever)
still can't deny that my failure to do well in baiyungang has been bugging me alot recently.. i'm sorry but i guess the more ppl tell me it's good, the more i don't believe. and then suddenly, someone grants my wish and tells me that i didn't really do very well, my confidence level basically plunged... isn't my reaction damn ironic?
wadever... feel like sleeping on forever.. i mean isn't it like cool? u don't get bothered by anything... in fact nothing at all...

~i would have you smile, not grief for those whose time has come

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