understanding

sometimes it feels like a part of u

sometimes it takes alot out of you,
especially if it's something that you don't deal with often....

i couldn't understand why you were angry with me.... it was like walking around in a foggy area, trying to get you to sympathise with me, trying to get you to understand what was going on, trying to get you to tell me that i'm not alone....

i couldn't understand why you couldn't feel the same way as i did.... out of everyone i knew, you were the closest i felt to at that point of time, but u just threw me away like that.... just like that

i feel like an authistic child....

it's tiring when your senses are amplified, and any slightest form of rejection brings you to the point of depression & low self worth. u can do anything, anything at all to just let this pain go away... and when all this is over, u realise what a failure u are...

it's just this vicious cycle....

no one is a born councillor, no one is born to deal with this kind of situations...
but somehow we just have to learn.... fall & learn, fall & learn...

maybe it's weird.... but sometimes we've been trained to look not at the content but at the tone...
maybe that's why something that may not mean much to you means alot to me...

it's amazing how much can happen to you within such a short time
u lose the people u love
u see through people with their lies & agendas
u look at the world with a greater understanding
u create your dreams & goals with a firmer resolution
u learn not to identify yourself with anyone
u learn to let go of relationships tt doesn't work out or doesn't go anywhere
u learn to love urself & to live for no one else because no one else is living for u
u learn to distance urself from the hurt and the pain

try to listen with your heart sometime, maybe you'll see so much more....