just what is sharing ur troubles & what is overburdening others with ur problems?
i think there's always a fine line drawn b/w what is attention seeking & seeking comfort from ur friends.
maybe it's just me but whenever problems crop up in sch & u have so much emotions pent up inside u, e first person u look for is never ur family members but instead ur friends. u start keying in ur msg furiously into e phone & send it to e first person tt comes into ur mind ie. ray is such a bastard, he looks like a fucking balding monkey!#*$(^%# & hope for a reply that ranges from
1. comforting friend
(hey wad happened, r u ok? dun be upset, i'm sure u r nt what he thinks)
2. reflecting ur sentiments friend
(YAR LOR, what a piece of shit he is, nt only is he bald, he is a f***ing dork as well. i'll stuff durians up his ass for ya.)
3. the solutions & showing u e other side of e story friend
(hmmm, maybe u shld avoid talking to him for a while. i guess he must have felt very stressed too.)
maybe we just needed a channel for us to express what was kept inside, maybe we just needed someone to point us to a way which we can get out of this frustrating situation. or maybe we needed someone to tell us tt everything's gonna be alright.
friends, u assume, will always be there to carry ur burden, to reflect ur sentiments & to give u what u need when u can't get enough of it from e relevant authorities ie ur parents. maybe it's this unspoken rule tt said tt friends will be there for u 24/7 tt u r filled with e romantic notion tt it is e requirement tt all ur friends must meet. look @ all e songs tt have been sung abt friendship, e quotes tt have been made abt this special bond tt more often then not, we take all this "i'll always be there for u" promises for granted.
true, that's what friends are for, to help u up when u fall down, to cheer u up when u feel blue, to lend u a listening ear or shoulder to cry on. it is a bond worth celebrating, but apparently it's nt smthing tt we cherish much. with e expensive presents tt u've bought for their birthday, it is as if they have signed a contract in return to be there to give ur attention deficit life more attention, love & more attention. u make sure tt they honour their contract, by expecting them to pamper u when u're stressed out & then u're filled with their love, u sneak back into ur own little world only to come back for more later because there's just nt enough attention tt u can extract out of ur friend.
u forget tt u friend is human, ur friend faces e same problems as u do in life, maybe even worse. u forget tt ur friend needs u in return, ur support & ur care. as much as u need them to tell u tt everything will be ok, they need u to tell them tt things will be fine & i'm sure u can do it. basically, u forget. as long as it doesn't concern UR welfare, UR happiness, U, u forget.
i'm nt saying it's wrong to share ur troubles, in fact it is what bonds us together as we face each crisis in our lives together with another person. but forget abt claiming another person to be ur friend when u don't bother to share her burden, or "think tt" e person might need some time alone & she'll tell me when she's ready, or u're "too afraid" tt u might hurt her if u ask her wad's e problem now. i think it's bullshit. what do u mean u think? wad do u mean u're "afraid of hurting", yeah rite u're afraid of hurt, u're afraid u'll hurt urself, nt her.
honestly, it takes just this much effort to reach out to ppl tt u care. u just need to open ur mouth & listen with ur ears. ur friends willingly lent ur theirs & reached out to u no matter how tired they may be. have u even tried? it's another matter when ur friend tells u to shut up when u try but don't bother to give excuses when u haven.
~Friends aren't jumper cables. You don't throw them into the trunk and pull them out for emergencies.~