war does not determine who's right, but who's left...

nice quote right... a pun somemore...
somehow i still don't really get what a pun is... listening to a acapalla by tension which sounds... out of tune...
recently i feel less... burderned.. maybe i have learnt how to let go...
i rmb telling faith about my learning to let go philosophy... that was a long while back....
what did i say.... hmmm... both of us faced this problem of being plagued by guilt, embarrassment and other emotions easily... maybe other people face the problems as well but we identified this as a similarity for the both of us... i was telling her how i used to cling on to everything in life, then these emotions made me very unhappy, very burdened but now i don't and am not really affected by anything in life, i'm more carefree....
then faith gave me a very envious look and asked me:" how did you manage to do that?"
me:"i don't know... i physcoed myself or i slowly learnt how to..."
that was something like over conversation... i can't really rmb the exact words that came out of our mouths...
at that time when i told her this, i thought i knew what it meant to let go, i thought i had managed to get out of the darkness of leaving the past behind and learning to look forward...
i was too proud... it was all a mirage... or maybe i was less burdened by lousy grades and friendships so i thought nothing could beat me down... i was wrong...
i've learnt quite alot... from friendships built... i've learnt to observed... and i learnt alot... about the ugly manipulative side of mankind... i've learnt somethings are really not within our control... we don't have to pray to supreme being and hope that all will go well... it's self dellusion and extremely stupid... i've learnt that there's a extent to how much we can help people, to get my piriorities straight... that friends come and go... no use clinging on to what is left of a bond, to insist on what used to be and what will be...
life itself is to never stop learning, it's a journey of discovery and learning about yourself.... it never stops...
i watched a video recently that was interviewing a famous host in china, yang lan. she said that one will never know who he or she really is for if one does, he or she would be a immortal.
oh well... will write nxt time.... janna...

~I would have you smile, not grief for those whose time has come