extreme emotions such as anger n depression clouds judgement
it impairs u
to e point where u can't think.
but e worse thing is

u leave no room for negotiation.

u just need to trust me more.

i was busy fending off an over zealous victim of a apparent "failed relationship"
followed by a confession of sorts which i wasnt really prepared to hear
and we ended it off with a concerned friend getting agitated because we didn't see where each other was coming from

guess it hasnt been going well.

and yes when u're intentions are misunderstood there can only be alot frustration pent up inside because u start to wonder what u've done or said wrong to cause all this agitation and negativity.

i might be tat upset cus my pride was bruised. that u didn't believe me to be capable enough to look at this issue and deali with it in an appropraite manner.

i might be feeling down because i wish there was a way i could tell u that despite me sounding overly irrational and taking more chances with the unknown then i should have, that i did do my research, that i did think of what are the possibilities. i won't just jump into a fire without a fire-proof vest or not knowing how to get out of the fire alive or should i get burnt what are the other alternatives i can take to escape. so u don't have to worry because i don't want u to and i want u to trust that i can take care of myself.

u just need to trust me more.

from me to HBT

my heart is always 2 hours ahead of where i currently am

n it is tiring?


n maybe it's nt because i don't know
it's cus i dun wanna start a rship at all
i dont trust feelings
i dont trust love
they are intangible
they are not real

to u, u & u

when we no longer can bear our hearts n fears to each other
that's when the love stops and the doubt grows.
tt's when one becomes increasingly more paranoid than the other.
but i guess it's alright.

we were born alone in this world anyway.

the oxygen thief

i can't rmb e exact lines u said.
but it suddenly occurred to me that instead of letting u in on my life
i might be burdening u with my troubles instead.

maybe none of us can accept melo-drama imperfections
even that of close friends
in fact i wonder most of e time if we were where we used to be
it's like for her, our time stopped after the day she pushed me into a corner
for us, our time stopped along e banks we sat at
where u talk abt how disconnected u are from e ppl who were close to u
i guess time sort of stopped there for me
while u moved on.

i dun blame u i guess.
i wasnt e perfect one too.
n i wonder y u keep pushing me back to her
when we're already so far apart

i'm happy for the way we were
n e way u will be

i'm srry for disappointing u
u still are awesome
goodbye